So, actually, I was writing on a different post, but suddenly I realized, that I wasn’t feeling happy with it. I sat there, searching the right words, changing pictures and it simply didn’t feel good. The pictures looked crap, my writing was rubbish and it didn’t feel like me.
So I stopped.
I started writing this instead.
So. I started this blog only a few days ago ( it feels like much longer to me, though ❤ ) and I love it! I genuinely do. I’m so happy that I created out n’ about. It’s the thing that keeps me motivated during the day, it’s what I think about in boring schoollessons, it’s what I’m planning every evening whilst I’m trying to sleep.
I was well aware of the risk, that at some point, I’d get doubts about what I write, about what I publish. But I wasn’t expecting them to come today. Not yet.
But, I guess, probably it’s just good to have them now already, because now I know for sure that I take blogging serious.
The thing is, I was unhappy with my post, because tried to reach a level with my blog that I simply can’t reach. I looked up to all those wonderful, professional blogs and I tried to do it like them.
But I can’t.
I can’t do it like them. Not only because I don’t have their material, but mainly, because I don’t have their experience. I realized that I have to grow with my blog. I have to grow and approve with every post I publish, every photo I take, every single word I write.
And that’s fine.
I have to start little, unexperienced, not quite sure yet, where everything’ll lead me. But I’m growing step by step.
As everyone did.
As everyone still does.
If I take this journey, I need to accept the fact that it’s a learning-by-doing. One day, maybe, I’ll reach the point where I want to be. But for now, I am pleased with a perfect imperfect content . It doesn’t matter if it isn’t professional, because I’ m not. This blog reflects me right now, not someone that I want to be.
The most important thing for me, is, to be totally honest. I don’t want this to be fake, I don’t want this to be something unreal. I want to look at every single post thinking: ”Yep, that’s me who wrote this. That’s totally me and I like it!” If I’d start publishing stuff only to publish anything, I could stop blogging straightaway.
But I don’t.
I didn’t and I wont.
Instead, I’m publishing an original, raw, elena-ish content. And that feels good, that feels right. That makes me happy! Because I stay true to myself and I listened to my inner instinct. I’m going to press the “publish”-button with a big smile on my face! And I hope you’re going to read this with a smile too! (or maybe a grin 😉 )
I’ m out and about…